Poetry Podcast Episode 1: My Sky

Time is a beautiful thing, and now that I have a bit more time, the creative works that have been piling up are coming out in the world. To start, here’s the audio performance of My Sky, the latest on the poetry front. For my sister.

Many thanks, again, to the fly boy.

Many thanks to Professor Eleyni for critiquing, suggesting edits, and encouraging me to go to audio — because he has always loved my performances.

The sky held the dead for me
Souls of men I had loved and lost
Souls of men who had loved me
No heaven or hell in my realm
Just sky
Souls wander without purpose
Without direction

Visualizations oversimplified
Men in trite white gowns
No angel wings, but turn up the audio
Idle chatter, gossip among the gods
Yes, she was beautiful
Yes, she loved me hard
Yes, I loved her above all others

A grandfather who left me
Bewildered and alone
On my toddler’s tricycle
A young lover who hit a land mine
Having tasted me sweet
That same morning
A brother (with severed head)
And nephew who never knew
What hit them or why
A favorite cousin who blew smoke rings
With the cigars I smoke now
To keep the scent of him alive
A father, who taught me how to read the water
Who will never again help me navigate

Because of this
Because of them
I have feared the sky

How can I possibly face the loss
Of my one unconditional love?
Not man, but woman
Closest/dearest/same-as-me/mermaid sister
I will not see my sister in my sky
I swear, I must, I will change my sky
She will not walk with my men

If I have to change the world, I will
If I have to change the way I see the world, I will
I did, with faith and trust in a man
I hardly loved
I challenged the sky
A man with a kind enough heart
To take on my fear without loving me
Without knowing my men, my sky, my stories

He says: Breathe
He says: Look
He says: Let me see your hands
My hands? No
Let me see your sky

The sky holds no ghosts
The clouds are just water
No one walks there

I walk on this earth, with my sister’s hand in mine